Fast food and large beverages for our humble narrator

I walked past the Burger King by the head of the Hawthorne bridge today. On a small placard near the drive through I spotted the glory that is the “BK Veggie Burger”. Oh holy of holy! Oh glorious god in heaven I have a reason to go into a fast food place! I’ve missed cheap fast food so much. I haven’t had fast food since I went vegetarian, which is about a year ago or so. Skipping with delight I entered the door and gazed upon a sight nearly forgotten… the shining signs of fatty goodness, the dirty floors, the lack of ketchup cups. Sweet god it felt like I was a kid again. I ordered the veggie burger meal, with onions rings, large mother fucking onion rings, good sir!
I wept in ecstasy as I sipped upon my Lipton unsweetened ice tea and dipped my delicious onion ring into ketchup… finally, I can eat vegetarian food with the celerity and thrift of the meat eating populace. Finally I can have 24 hour drive through… finally, I can have it my way.

BTW: That meal actually made me feel a little ill, and I will not be frequenting aforementioned establishment again any time soon.

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